Halo Night Carnage Report: The Corky Kills Noah Edition

Another good night of Halo this week, even if Graham decided he had more important things to do. However, he was kind enough to log onto his Xbox without actually joining the game, leaving us to spam him with  invites and wonder why he doesn't love us anymore. Is it because we've gained weight? Or have you been seeing Call of Duty behind our backs?! You cheating bastard!

Anyways, last time there were complaints that I didn't include enough shots of ExpectingCorky killing me in the Carnage Report. Well, customer service is my middle name. (Actually it's Hiatt, but "Customer Service" really does sound better.)

Sniped!

Halo Night Carnage Report: The Returnening

Halo Night made a glorious ignominious return to Blood Gulch this weekend. A few "highlights"....

First, joe buzzkill forgets which side the driver's seat is on.

Some Stuff I've Been Reading

Liar's Poker and The Big Short by Michael Lewis
To the extent that one can have physical affection for written words, I have a total crush on Michael Lewis' writing. Liar's Poker is about the Gordon Gecko culture of 80s Wall Street. Lewis was a fresh out of grad school, and had the good fortune to land a job at Salomon Brothers-- a major Wall Street bond trading firm, and the originators of the mortgage-backed security.* The Big Short is about the economic meltdown of 2008, as seen through the eyes of a handful of analysts who saw the disaster coming. Though they were written 20 years apart, when read together these books are an awesome chronicle of the rise and fall of the mortgage security market. Lewis has a real flair for personal details that keep the stories and real-life characters engaging and interesting, such that the books read like novels, even during detailed discussions on how bonds work.

*If Salomon sounds familiar, that's because they were the inspiration for The Bonfire of the Vanities, and Liar's Poker reads like a real-life version of that book. Except that Liar's Poker is well written, and enjoyable to read. (Oh yeah, I went there. Tom Wolfe is a hack.)

Mass Effectin'

I finished up up Mass Effect 2 over the weekend, finally. I am an OCD completionist on these games, so I scoured every uninhabited rock in the galaxy in search of sidequests and loot.

I don't think I've ever seen such a frank, uncompromising self-assessment between sequels. The first game did very well, both critically and commercially, but Bioware looked deep and hard at the game they created, and they were not sparing of themselves. Mass Effect has emerged from its chrysalis leaner, smoother, and more streamlined than before.  The wretched, borderline torturous inventory system was completely scrapped, and replaced by a highly streamlined collection of hardware. And when I say streamlined, I mean there are only three or four entries each type of gun. That's a far cry from the 150+ (per gun category!!) that you had to juggle the first time around. Armor upgrades are now just permanent stat boosts, and ammo types have been relegated to powers rather than items. You even have a personal assistant to tell you when you have e-mail.

Prejudicial Treatment

You have no excuse to not download Section 8: Prejudice right now; this is budget gaming at its finest. Incidentally, I started writing this post two weeks ago. It's taken me this long to complete it because I've been playing Section 8 with every spare minute.

Apparently, Prejudice is a sequel to a first-person shooter that came out in retail two years ago, which was well-received by critics but never rose above obscurity. TimeGate Studios surprised the gaming world when it announced that not only would there be a sequel, but it would be a donwloadable title priced at  $15 (or 1200 MS points for us Xbox owners.) I'm impressed with the fact that they were able to make a fully operational FPS available for download, complete with a campaign and creative multiplayer that is at least as fun as the retail competition.

Saints Row is More Fun than GTA, or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Urban Sandbox Games Again

I have issues with open world games. Especially Grand Theft Auto. Back in the days of yore, I played Vice City to 100% completion, which even by today's standards was a huge feat. But ever since then, the series just hasn't held the same allure. Maybe it was because the Frankie outfit was kind of a letdown, but I think one part of the problem is that sandbox games give me too much freedom. When I'm able to do whatever I want, whenever I want, I end up not doing anything because I have no clear goals and objectives, and therefore no sense of progress or reward. I just drive around aimlessly, run over some  pedestrians, die in a shootout and turn the console off.

But another big issue is that Grand Theft Auto can just be a frustrating game to play. I decided to gave GTA IV a shot a few months ago, because it had some ridiculously good reviews, but I got frustrated as soon as I started taking missions. Don't get me wrong, GTA IV is a good game with super high production values, and you can see the polish on ever surface. But even so, a host of minor annoyances kept me from enjoying the game as much as I should have.

War for Cybertron

That's no moon...

So.Yes. I have played Portal 2. And it is excellent. In every way. It may, in fact, be the best game ever, of all time. But as much as I want to talk about it RIGHT NOW, I have yet to play the co-op campaign. And I have a feeling that-- more so than gels, excursion funnels, and thermal discouragement beams-- the addition of a partner changes the game at a fundamental level. So my write-up for Portal 2 will have to wait until I can schedule some time with Sr. Joseph P. Buzzkillington to see what Atlas and P-Body have to offer.